"how to" manual

{This is how to make a horrible situation even more horrible}

Last year I began swimming once a week for workouts and triathlon training. After many frustrating moments in the change room, I settled for the most flattering of the unflattering swimsuits. Sport suits are not made to look good, they are made for utility. The black TYR suit had been working quite well until I noticed this Saturday that it has become sheer in some sections. This was likely due to my breaking one (or both) of the two cardinal rules in swimwear: washing it in the washer or leaving it out in the sun. In any event, I had to replace it as I wasn't about to show more of myself than was already necessary.

I went to a local sport store that sells a variety of equipment and apparel. I was frustrated at the thought of trying on suits yet again. It is probably my least favourite activity, next to shoe shopping (I have exceptionally narrow feet, so I usually leave stores angry or close to tears). The change rooms in this particular store are located in the very centre. The doors are always locked and it usually takes a solid five minutes to locate someone to unlock it for you. I had tried on numerous suits and was torn between two. The mirror in my change room was smudged and I wanted to get a better look. My cell phone rang and it was a friend requesting a favour. I continued talking to her as I exited the room to look in the mirror in the main area. Somewhere between holding the door open and talking to my friend, I lost control and the door slammed shut. There I was... in the middle of a sports store, in an awful one piece swimsuit, with no salesperson in site. The door went from floor to ceiling so there was no way I could crawl under. I poked my head out to the left and saw no one. I poked my head out to the right and saw no one. I attempted to act confident but was shrinking inside. I took several steps around the store and finally saw two male workers talking to each other. I politely asked one of them to open the door that I had locked myself out of. I re-entered my change room feeling completely mortified.

So if you don't think that swimsuit shopping is that bad, try locking yourself out of your change room. It will make it one of your worst shopping expeditions ever.