cars, cars, cars

There have been many vehicles that have caused an aversive reaction within me. Past offenses have been Hummers, Aztecs, Ponys and multiple sports cars (such as Ferraris and Corvettes). However, the recent offenders are as follows:

1. The Smart Car: Who cares if it is environmentally friendly and gets good gas mileage. It's damn ugly and looks like a death trap.


2. Scion xb: I saw these all over California. I thought they were "lowered" until I realized they were made that way. Ugh.


3. PT Cruiser: Nothing needs to be said about this car, except maybe "UGGGLY."


4. Dodge Magnum: This car reminds me of a souped up hearse.

Honorable mention: the Dodge Caliber

Dani, looks like you win. The prize will be another Aisy mixed CD. I agree that most all Dodge vehicles are on the list of "damn, that's ugly."

So, here is my short list. What's yours?

leavin'

I'm headed out of town shortly to the hot spot of Vernal. No disgusting pictures this weekend as calving season is over. My first pop quiz had a lukewarm response, so I'm trying it again. This one has to do with my personal disdain for certain cars. Dani should get at least one correct but I think I may be up to 5. This time I really will award a prize for the person that gets the most correct. I will have a post on Tuesday or Wednesday showcasing the ugliest cars currently on the market.*

*I apologize in advance to any readers who may like or own any of my most hated cars. One can overcome bad taste!

take thought

Today my carelessness almost led to a catastrophe. When I was younger I could shout to my mom to bring me some more toilet paper when I forgot to check the roll before doing my business. She heard innumerable panicked screams of "Hey Mom, I need some toilet paper" from all her children.

As an independent, single adult I have no such person to help me out when I'm in such a bind. So, I typically prepare for emergencies by keeping an extra role in my washroom. Unfortunately paper products have not been on my mind as of late, thus leaving me unprepared. Thankfully I had a few squares to spare... and after the hand washing, quickly resupplied the area with pillowy soft t.p.

know your audience

I confess that I have occasionally sent forwards. Several months back I sent a forward to a select group of friends that may have been interested in the cause I am about to rant on. You will note that I said select. I actually felt uncomfortable doing so but I was doing a favour for man that deserved none.

Yesterday I received not one, but two mass emails asking me to donate money to a presidential candidate. My irritation about the forward was two-fold. Firstly, the one person only had my email through his church duties. I rarely speak to him and he would have no idea as to my political inclination. I have no clue who the other person was. I could only gather that we both receive music emails from a mutual friend. These two idiots abused my email account without really knowing me. Now for the second point, that solidifies the above one, I AM NOT AN AMERICAN. Even if I felt this presidential hopeful was the best thing since sliced bread, I am not legally allowed to donate to his campaign.

I have half a mind to send a searing email to both of them.

the answer is...

Urbane: Notably polite or polished in manner. I wish my Dad, err anonymous, was more urbane. It could have avoided several embarrassing childhood moments when he didn't hold his tongue.

Congratulations Andrew on the first correct response.

For a Friday smile:

A few weeks back in group therapy, my co-therapist had the boys do an exercise. They were asked to line their page from A to Z and write a word or phrase that showcased one of their strengths. They were working quietly when one teen put up his hand and asked "what letter does intelligent start with?"

There was silence, then some stifled laughter followed by fits of giggles. I could not refrain from laughing and hid my face behind my paper. My co-therapist, also smiling, said "anyone laughing who wrote 'kind' as a trait should probably erase it." Yup, scratch that off my list.

pop quiz

Yesterday I was surprised by the definition of "urbane." I was talking to a fellow co-worker about one of my clients, stating he was the "bane of my existence." This co-worker is a wordsmith, interesting as he is a Smith. Anyway, he asked if I could use bane in a sentence without using the word existence. As the discussion proceeded I started playing with the word urbane. My mind often wanders to non-related tangents and the homonym-like quality of urbane and bane made it a natural transition. We then discussed what we thought urbane meant. I had some vague notions but did not know the true definition. Wordsmith and I learned something new by looking it up. I was completely misguided in what I thought urbane meant, as was he.

Now this leads to the quiz. I want to know what you all think the definition of "urbane" is. I realize it would be extremely easy to cheat but I trust your honesty. Plus, it is so much more gratifying to know you're right because you're just that damn smart. Maybe there will even be a prize... especially if it is also used in a sentence correctly. I will post the answer on Friday for those of you that choose not to check Merriam-Webster online after you post.

Ready, set, go.

waste not

If you happen to live in Utah and you happen to have your sister-in-law in town, and her friend happens to suggest you eat at The Pie, you should agree. The pizza is indeed delicious and all the graffiti is, well, interesting. However, if you happen to go to the bathroom before you leave and another customer happens to ask if you are taking your leftovers home and you say "no", don't be surprised when he lifts up the dirty plates and napkins that you've piled on top of your food so he can grab your pizza and bread sticks. Apparently his large pizza and beer weren't quite enough for him.

I was pretty sure I had wiped my nose on my napkin and who knows the germs from the plate sitting on the table which then sat on the pizza. We're all pretty clean gals, disease free, fairly safe to share food with but that's just sick.

you know it's bad when...

Last night I dreamed I was getting married. In my dream there was no groom, no excited feelings, no ring. It was the night before my wedding and I was still shopping for my wedding dress. I was unsuccessful at several stores and was going to resign myself to just wearing a plain white dress. I woke up and laughed. So, you know it's bad when you are dreaming about your incredible talent of procrastination.