my lame mastercard rip-off

1 water bottle - $1.09
1 new iBook keyboard - $79.95
Putting the lid on your water bottle - Priceless



Lesson WELL learned

delays

I was all prepared with new posts in my head but I fried my keyboard. I spilled less than a teaspoon of water on my mac and POOF, it ain't working no more. Well, the keys were all jumbled and sometimes two letters would type when I just pushed one. I'm waiting on an estimate for the fix but I'm DYING without my internet at night. So, if everyone could pray for my mac or say a few hail mary's, I'd really appreciate it.

uh, awkward

Perhaps "babypoo" is a term of endearment, but when I saw this license plate

all I could think of was crap... crap in a diaper... smelly, crappy baby poop.

Who thought this was a good choice for a vanity plate? Big, big mistake.

At least this made me laugh and laugh and laugh.

too much

Yesterday I saw more than I wanted to. I was finishing one of my laps in the pool when the man in the lane beside me mooned me! Okay, his swim trunks started coming off as he was swimming but I saw full-on BUTT. He did several swim strokes before he pulled up his shorts. I'm sure he felt the water against his bare bum or the trunks hanging down to his thighs so I'm not sure why he didn't pull them up right away. I'm just glad it was his butt facing me. Then in the locker room a woman got ready in just her tanktop and underwear. Is it really too much to put on pants while you do your hair makeup? Too much, much too much.

Unfortunately I ate too much hummus last night. My poor workout buddies got to smell garlic mixed with my sweat this morning in spin class. Garlic is so delicious but so dangerous.

By the way, why do we call swim trunks "trunks?" And, any good stories about "too much?"

doesn't get better than this...

There are few things that make me smile more than this


or this


and this


and my newest thing to make me smile, my "niece" Teagan. I'm calling myself her adopted Auntie since I have no nieces and nephews in Utah. I think a best friend's child counts, don't you?


Happy Sunday

(PS-Denise, you can sorta see the new hairdo in all the photos, except the Boston one. My new glasses are featured in the last photo)

changes

The years change, the seasons change, and inevitably so does life. We're not far in to the new year and a lot is changing in my life. One of my BFF's adopted a beautiful baby girl this month. I'm ecstatic for them but it will invariably change the amount of time we can spend out and about. My own life will soon take a sudden change as I accepted a supervisor position within my company but on the girls campus. No longer will I be surrounded by hormonal teenage boys. I'll get to deal with emotional teenage girls (along with all the other parts to my new job). I'm excited for the advancement but it is bittersweet. Telling the boys today was one of the hardest days of my professional life. I barely know any of the staff over there so it will be like starting fresh. However, a raise never hurts!

Heck, I even changed my hair colour (albeit slightly) this year.

All this change is good. And although I'm nervous, I'm excited for what lies ahead.

only on a monday

As if getting up Monday mornings aren't bad enough, I torture myself by swimming every Monday. I like swimming but I hate chlorine. I also hate getting up early. This morning i drove to the gym only to realize that I forgot my toiletry bag. I'm furious with myself and drive back home as quickly as possible. In my haste, I am not paying attention to the container full of milk (for my after workout breakfast). After taking a corner a little too fast I look down only to see the milk everywhere. This is one of those moments when you CAN cry over spilt milk. The floor mat was sopping wet and the smell of vanilla soy milk penetrated throughout the car. I have yet to make it to the car wash to soap it down but it's not something I'm particularly excited about in below freezing weather.

So to recap, my drive to the gym took 45 minutes instead of 15. I spilled milk all over the passenger side floor (and it still smells). And I can smell chlorine on me with even the slightest movement.

Mondays. I hate them.

go green

Last month I decided to get "greener." My roommates and I signed up for our local recycling program, I purchased canvas shopping bags and now I want to do more. As silly as it sounds, it makes me feel better. I was so stoked to find out that HP attaches a self-addressed envelope to their ink replacements so you can send back your old one for recycling! Thank you HP. So my goal for 2008 is to find even more ways to be earth friendly. I also want to cook more and eat healthier (that's why I want to start cooking). We'll see how well I do on that last one. And maybe, just maybe, I'll run a full marathon.

So, if you have one, what do you resolve to do differently?

*Have I ever told my readers how amazing Jo is? She's the genius behind the very cool New Year's Eve photo.

ho ho ho

As I sat down to write, all I could hear in the house was a faint "Ho Ho Ho" from my niece upstairs. I think she is reading something. She's so sweet.

Today I tried my hand at domestic living and made some spicy chocolate covered pretzels. It wasn't really by choice but more of a demand from my sister. They turned out pretty good if I do say so myself. My mom was delighted to share the kitchen with two of her daughters (both of which are/were domestically challenged). It's hard to believe that Christmas is tomorrow. This whole month has been a blur. Work was crazy busy, kids were leaving and new kids were coming. I spoke at the graduation of two of my clients and it was all I could do from bursting in to tears. I'm excited for them to move on to real life but so scared at the same time. I learn something from each kid I work with, and some goodbyes are harder than others. This one was the toughest yet.

So, it is nice to settle in with the comforts of home and be surrounded by people that I love. My nieces and nephews are growing up so fast and are a delight to be around. There is much laughter, singing and even a little dancing. There isn't any fresh snow to greet us before Christmas but otherwise it feels perfect. Soon Santa will descend on the house while we are all fast asleep and in the morning the excitement and awe of children will fill the house.

Merry Christmas sweet readers. I hope you all feel the warm fuzzies that this season is known to bring. May 2008 fill your life with memories, even if they aren't always the perfect ones. There is so much to learn and receive from life. I wouldn't change a thing (okay, maybe a few things).

Best wishes to you all.

names

My readers all know that I have an unusual name. Granted my parents didn't call me Apple, Camera, Puma, Fifi or Banjo (actual names of celebrity children) but it's still a little different.

I wonder if my name would be different had I been born in Rome. Apparently some parents were forced to change the name of their child, Friday, because it might hinder him from having serene interpersonal relationships. Compared to a lot of names out there, Friday seems fairly benign. Apparently the powers that be in Rome didn't think so. Click here to read the full story. I do think some names have gotten way out of control but I think government interference is even MORE out of control.

thank goodness for spell check

(Or, Why don't people use it?)

So, I am a member of the fast growing "Facebook." At first I was leery but then I began to appreciate all the contact I have with long lost friends. It's also a good way to beat others in scrabble or get beaten. I really enjoy seeing what people are up to these days. Anyway, there is a handy little section that is the "News Feed." Here you get information on the coming and goings of friends and I noticed one of my friends joined a group called:

"If Hillery Clinton becomes President I am moving to Cananda!"

I went to the group believing it was a joke. It had to be if Hillary and Canada were both spelled wrong. Upon further examination it seemed like a legitimate group. Today there was a posting about Glenn Beck being the best guy in televesion [sic]. By the way, I have always wanted to use sic in a sentence. I'm glad I got my chance.

I'm not trying to be rude. I admit to using poor grammar and misusing punctuation (I am sure this post is full of them). I have even had the occasional misspell. However, I do think if you are going to create a group opposing something or trying to make a statement, you might want to spell it correctly. Otherwise how are you going to be taken seriously?

makes no difference where i go

A local news anchor retired the other day and I was shocked to discover that my beloved hometown song was not so original.

Exhibit A:


I can still sing this word for word. So, imagine my surprise, and dismay, when I realized it was a nation-wide (and Canada-wide) campaign for various CBS locales. Until this musical montage was played on Michelle King's last broadcast I was in the dark.

Exhibit B:


It's the same singer and even the vibrato-ey part at the end is the same, except the word. I feel like my whole childhood was a sham.

And this version is for my sister (scroll down to the Utah link). Apparently grown women still swoon for Donny.

***UPDATE: I just read this article on Wiki. Wisconsin, you win. *Sigh

i want this

Long ago I emailed one of my music gurus regarding a song I desperately wanted. Sadly, he informed that Cat Powers cover of a Cat Stevens song was only recorded for the specific commercial I saw it on. Now, I'm not a huge diamond fan but this De Beers commercial gets me every time... because of the song. Every couple of months I Google it again in hopes that the full song has been recorded. I am always disappointed. My one Christmas wish would be a full length version of this song. Oh how I wish I had the money to get her to do a whole cover and release it for my listening consumption.

What song from a commercial do you love? Enjoy mine if you don't have one.

the single life

(This is filed under TMI-too much information. I don't know why I am opening myself up like this but I am)

Life has been busy but good. For the first time in years I feel like I am in a good place. Last year was one of the darkest years of my life and it had absolutely nothing to do with my dating life. I know a lot of my past experiences had piled up but I wasn't blue because there was no man in my life. All that was obvious to me was that this dark cloud seemed to follow me everywhere. I was a walking, talking human Eeyore. Now the sun has come out, the clouds have departed and I can breathe again.

This brings me back to the title. I am single. I am loving being single. I spent too many years in my twenties feeling the pangs of being dateless. I analyzed what could possibly be holding me back. Was I pretty enough? Did I talk too much? Was I too faithless so my prayers weren't listened to? All of this eroded my self-esteem and I started to actually believe all the bullshit I told myself. Today I can look at myself honestly and fairly. I can be critical, talk too much and question every last thing, but I'm rather funny and a good listener. I can look in the mirror and truly believe that "I look cute today." I really am starting to like myself. The more I like myself, the less desire I have to be married or have children. This is where my current dilemma has hit. I grew up in a religion that focuses on family. The family is central and what we should all be striving for. I believe in family. I love my own family. They are the world to me. I know the family unit is so important in our society... and yet, I don't feel the pang for it like I once did. I go to church and people talk of their desire to start their own family. Friends tell me "I wish you could find the right guy." Some friends even talk to me about their own discouragement that marriage hasn't happened yet. I hear my lonely friends and I empathize with their plight, but sigh with relief that it's not me. Then my already over-analyzing brain goes in to overdrive. Am I fooling myself? Is this a way to protect myself from feeling the pangs of loneliness?

The sting hits sometimes, like the night I listened to Regina Spektor sing "Samson." I thought of how lovely it would be to hold hands with a fine fellow who loves me, listening to beautiful music. But the thought left as quickly as it came. I am open to this marriage idea. I would never turn away a handsome, funny, kind and loving man. I also know I will be okay if I don't. I have started dreaming again. I love my dreams.



But I don't know how they fit with the the notion of family... my own family. I don't want reassurances that it will all work out and I'm not soliciting comments for "you go girl, be happy being single." I'm trying to verbalize all these thoughts that go through my head. I'm trying to balance religious beliefs with current feelings. Can I truly be happy being single? Am I being selfish? Am I protecting myself?

I don't know. Time will tell. I do know that I never want to let go of how I feel now. I love that my smiles are genuine again. Laughing has never felt so good. I love myself, now that's something to brag about.

CAN

I've decided not to write about burning my forehead with my flat iron or crotching myself in spin class yesterday but rather to leave you with something inspirational. I've been trying to figure out how to download this video to my computer so I can use it in group therapy today. It doesn't matter how much I watch this video, I always cry. It is a reminder of how fortunate I am, and the goodness in others.


To read more on the Hoyts go here. Happy Thursday everyone. Mine will be... I have two adorable nieces in town and I'm healthy and happy.

the master of tact

On Monday's there is a very attractive swim coach in the lane beside me. I have admired him from afar but did not have the courage to talk to him. My friend talked to him (she's married) this past week and we discovered he worked at another treatment centre. We were unsure if he was married or not, and truthfully, I didn't really want to know! This past Monday, Kris and I were talking in the locker room, and jokingly I said "He was checking me out and even gave me a smile." Right as I was saying this, the female coach that was assisting him walked by us. I was completely mortified. In doing some research I found out he was married. So there I am, exaggerating the truth about a hot married man, making a complete fool of myself and he might actually find out what I said. Anytime I think of this story I want to find a large rock to hide under.

My three choices are to a) never go back to that pool again, b) avoid any and all eye contact and pretend I never said anything like that and hope the girl didn't tell him I said anything like that, or c) start a friendly conversation and act normal.

I'm leaning toward a or b. I can't count how many times I have done something similarly stupid. I don't think I will ever learn my lesson.

mass produced mistake

Creamies are a great way to finish off your meal. My favourite is chocolate, big surprise there. When I finished one last night I read the little inspirational quote they left me on the stick. I read it again and laughed and laughed.

I wonder how that gets by so many people. Have you ever been amused by a mass produced (or mini produced) mistake?

elevator etiquette and other such things

Prior to the 3rd of October I was a Vegas virgin. My first trip to Sin City was quite entertaining and a post will be done shortly. I am still waiting on a few pictures from my friends. Our hotel, the MGM Grand, was huge. Many minutes were spent waiting for elevators and watching other people also waiting for elevators. And no big surprise, a great many needed elevator training.

I wanted to give a beat down to those folks that would push past the line of people waiting for an elevator, quickly jump in to the first one to open, making the rest of us squeeze in or wait for another one. A line is a line is a line. Get in the back!

What annoyed me even more was when people would squeeze on to the elevator before the rest of us got off. I sometimes get antsy if I've been waiting awhile and the elevator is crammed full but haven't ever had one take off before I can get on. I assume that others have also had my experience, so having to shimmy around another person is beyond irritating.

Then there were the people that seemed as though they had never rode on an elevator. If the door opened, the assumed it was going the direction they were wanting to go to. If they spent one or two seconds looking around they would notice that the light identifies the direction it is heading. Oh how I wished I had counted the number of people that would start to get on the elevator only to turn back when we told them we were going up.

Apparently taking an elevator isn't as easy as 1, 2, 3.

dating game

So, when you are older and single, people want to help out by setting you up. I'm usually open to it because you never know, prince charming might just be your friend's second cousin once removed. The most recent request I received was from my sister-in-law's mother. The bio sounded positive... older, attractive, similar values, son of a prominent member in the community. So I gave my mom the go-ahead to send off my email.

I was sharing this information to my girlfriends yesterday and one said "Wait, I think one of the sons got in trouble with the law." I went home and used my google sleuthing skills only to find out that this young man had two disturbing arrests. I'm not in the business of outing other people so I'm not giving any further information but let's just say you wouldn't want to date someone with this history. I can forgive a DUI but there are some things I'm not messing with. I call my mom freaking out (she might have thought she was talking to a sailor with all the colourful words I was using). My mom had already sent my email to the setter-upper so she called her and luckily my email hadn't yet been sent to this guy. She was quite shocked at the news and completely understood my apprehension at this person having my email. After I calmed down I laughed a little. That could become a party story, you know "So my sister-in-law's mom tried to set me up with a (insert legal history). Guess things must really be desperate for me." {Chuckles all around}

Then several hours later I started to feel a little queasy again. How do we really know the people we are dating? If he had been an average Jo, a google search would have come up empty. People could have skeletons in their closets and I could be none the wiser. I guess life is fraught with risks, I'm just glad I knew about this one ahead of time. And for the record, I need a few more months before someone wants to set me up. This one left a bad taste in my mouth.

things to do in september

Just in case your September was dull, I'll give you some ideas for next year. My September was pretty fabulous.

Start your September with a mommy/daughter road trip. You can go anywhere, but my mom and I chose Moab. She was a super trooper on our several hikes in Arches National Park.





Pretty isn't it?

Turn 30, or at least pretend you just turned 30. I'm now discovering how fantastic it is. Your friends might be sneaky and decorate your office floor to ceiling. It was amazing and embarrassing.


Be sure to show appreciation to those that sent flowers. Top of a big birthday with pedicures and dinner with your closest friends (and phone calls with those far away).

Once you are feeling the vibe that 30 brings, socialize and flirt like crazy. It will score you two dates in one day (for you married folk, don't accept unless it is from your spouse). What can I say? I'm hot!

Book a flight to Boston and Vegas in October. This gives you something to look forward to once September is over.

Attend an Arcade Fire concert. The set will amaze you, as will their energy. Check out Dainon's blog for a more thorough review. Absolutely fantastic.

Round out your month with a trip to Vernal. You might just get an invite to participate in a cattle drive. The real cowboys will laugh at your city slicker-ness but it will still be worth it. I'm sure I would laugh at someone trying to get their horse to stop galloping or holding on for dear life as the beast jumps a ditch. However, if you get a chance to do something as cool as this, bring your camera. You will regret not being able to share the images that are in your head. It truly was a beautiful site to see... cows, mountains, horses, sun setting.

September really has proved to me (like Lisa says) that 30 really is the new 20, except you're smarter and richer. I'm pretty stoked about the next 10 years.