mediation vs. kicking butt

Today my friend and I met a former therapist at the gym. She was in practice for 15 years but now teaches martial arts. We left the gym laughing because it was easier than crying. We wondered if being a therapist your whole life is a pipe dream. We joked at what our next career would be after the therapy world burned us out. Maybe beating the crap out of people in a socially normative way is a good choice. Unfortunately I have no skills in any form of martial arts, other than my own creation used in defense against older brothers.

After several years of being in practice I have some hilarious stories. I also have some heartbreaking ones. I've learned to softly navigate boyhood crushes. I'm accustomed to being the punching bag when they can't say those things to their parent. And on numerous occasions I have been immensely frustrated with the choices my clients make. Yet despite all that, I couldn't imagine any other career...

quoting

There have been a lot of things going on in my life which has left little time for oringal thought on this blog. There was a comment on Postsecret that I read today and it seemed to sum up some of my thoughts fairly well. Enjoy...

"You know that point in your life when you realize that the house that you grew up in isn't really your home anymore? All of the sudden even though you have some place where you can put your stuff that idea of home is gone. You'll see when you move out it just sort of happens one day and it's just gone. And you can never get it back. It's like you get homesick for a place that doesn't exist. I mean it's like this rite of passage, you know. You won't have this feeling again until you create a new idea of home for yourself, you know, for you kids, for the family you start, it's like a cycle or something. I miss the idea of it. Maybe that's all family really is. A group of people who miss the same imaginary place." -Garden State

chew on this...

My sister sent me this link today. It happens to involve two things that I hate: rats and KFC.

take a break

I've noticed an unsettling trend with mp3 players. More and more people are wearing them while they are with others. I saw a dad walking with his family while listening to his iPod. Then last week I saw a couple holding hands while the boy was contently listening to music. A guy that wants to hold my hand is also going to be courteous enough to take a break from music. Seriously people, you can't just enjoy conversation? I love my shuffle when jogging or skiing but when I'm with people, I want to enjoy people. Take the buds out and try to just enjoy life... and people.

choices

Babies don't choose who they are born to. They don't choose if they are dressed in Gap or Wal-mart brand. They don't choose if they are breast fed or formula fed. They don't choose if they wear Pampers or Huggies. Girl babies certainly don't choose if their parent pastes little bows to identify the hairless wonder as a girl.
All of these choiceless acts are relatively harmless (except perhaps the family they were born in to and formula feeding). What irks me though is the choice of parents to pierce their little daughter's ears. I witnessed two baby girls in two different stores being traumatized over it. I recognize that piercing only hurts for a short time but there was plenty wailing and gnashing of teeth going on. The suckers barely soothed them. They looked frightened and distressed, and I had to wonder if it was really worth it. I wanted to cry for them. I thought the mother's must have felt slightly horrified as they held their girl's head tightly. Is it that important that everyone knows they are a girl at 6 months old or that their pierced ears will look so darling? I think kids are already growing up too fast. I see high heeled shoes in the kid section, mid-riff tops for pre-teens and hooped earrings on toddlers. I suppose it's a personal decision for each parent but it's not one that I support. Why not wait until they are begging you for pierced ears? They will promise to take care of them and clean their ears every single day. Then they'll regret the choice several months later when they have a massive infection from not cleaning them. The earrings will be stuck to their ears and it will be excruciatingly painful to remove the earrings. My mom can attest to my own process of ear neglect at the age of six. I don't think I re-pierced them until I was a teen. I don't even wear earrings now. Go figure.

avoidance

There were several subjects I avoided like the plague in university: math and hard science. I also managed to get two degrees without any business or economic classes which I now somewhat regret. Every day I hear about the NASDAQ and Dow Jones Industrial Average without any clue of what that actually means. I am assuming that when they are up, that's a good thing. Why? I have no idea. Today I even did a little reading on Wikipedia to help me understand it. I only got through the first paragraph before I felt like sleeping. I know that the NASDAQ is an electronic stock exchange but I don't comprehend why one would want it up. I'd like to feel smart when the news reports the NASDAQ is up or the Dow is down. But in all reality, how many average news viewers actually grasp the importance of the fluctuating markets?

Perhaps in my next life I will be a business maverick but until then, I will be hopelessly clueless.

cars

I wonder why emission and safety inspections are required to register your car in Utah. Who does this ultimately benefit? Do mechanics put a lot of money in to politician's coffers? I wonder why I typically wait till the last day to get my emission test and registration. Can I blame my procrastination on undiagnosed ADHD? And if I do, does that require me to start making changes? I wonder why another customer continued to sing out loud despite the close quarters and my unfriendly looks. While I admire his confidence to enjoy his music, does he really think the rest of us wanted to be subjected to it? Can't he recognize that we are already enduring a fuzzy radio station and a woman talking loudly on her cell? I wonder why I declined to pay an extra $10 fee to complete my registration there, as I had to wait another 20 minutes at town hall. I know I can be cheap but at what point do I value my time more than my money? Sometimes owning a vehicle can be a pain.

i love...

I love the Calgary Flames. I also loved the 80s (except for the junior high years). However, when you mix the Flames and the 80s you get this:



Can't say it doesn't bring a smile to my face but for all the wrong reasons.

hot stuff

I went skiing yesterday and was amazed to still see some of these things kicking around:

Don't these men and women know that if it is difficult to find them in stores it is likely out of fashion? It took me some time to find a picture on the internet let alone find a place that sells them. Not only are they a fashion faux pas but they are highly impractical. Sure, you don't get snow up your back if you wipe out but using the washroom must require some major technical skill.

current list

There have been a few things that have been annoying me lately so I have decided that it is list time again.

1. I have a penchant for celebrity gossip. It's trash and ridiculous but it helps me decompress from stressful work days. I will often peruse the different online articles but have become disenchanted. While I recognize that my literary skills can be lacking this type of journalism drives me (to quote Gwen) B-A-N-A-N-A-S. Cuz, like, you know, like I really want to like, read an article like as if it was written by a 15 year old or like Paris Hilton cuz like if it's about celebs then like it should be totally like, written all fun and silly and become really, zoinks, ha ha, irritating to read. I'm an educated reader who wants to occasionally read the dish without being insulted by ridiculous writing.
2. I hate that chlorine sticks to my body after showering and putting pretty smelling lotion on. It is particularly distasteful when I work out the next day and smell like a swimming pool. I am starting to rethink this whole triathlon training because I am not sure I can tolerate the next 7 months of weekly reeking of chlorine.
3. My landlord happens to be a on cruise the same week one of our pipes freeze. It has left us without cold water in the kitchen but more importantly, my toilet tank has not been refilling. Thank you mother nature for record setting cold.
4. Dry hands, dry hands, dry hands. I slather on the lotion repeatedly only to find them just as dry as they were five minutes ago. I had eczema as a kid and I think I currently have it on my hands. Another shout out to the dry freaking land that I am currently living in. I will never forget my lotion-free week I spent in Mexico. Now that was bliss.
5. The spell-check on blogger is by far the most pathetic thing I have ever seen. Words it does not recognize in this post: disenchanted, eczema, triathlon, slather, and blogger. I did have them all spelled correctly to begin with.

idol worship

Here's the footage...



And here's the spin.

say what?

My sister and I were shopping over the Christmas break when Nickelback started playing over the speaker system. We made a quick retreat out of the store to avoid any more unpleasantness and began a conversation over their popularity. It's shocking to see that they are consistently on the Top 10 list of iTunes downloads. I can appreciate that there are all sorts of musical tastes but Nickelback? Really? Chad Kroeger's voice has to be one of the most grating things I have heard. I swear my ears start bleeding. All the music sounds the same and damn, he's ugly. Then I read tonight that they won a People's Choice Award. While most of the winner's are "interesting" choices I am still bewildered about their popularity. How can anyone in their right mind listen to a whole Nickelback album, let alone vote for them? This is not a group that I am proud to say are Canadian.

(If you are a fan, please don't take offense but do explain the allure)

signs

If you, your future spouse, and your mother (in-law) are registering gift items at Target, this may be a sign that you need a few more years before taking the marriage plunge. If your mom actually needs to help you decide which salt and pepper shakers to get then how did you ever decide to get married? I'm glad she pointed out the difference between those that grind salt versus those that don't. I hope she is also able to steer you to the more pressing issues of your life. More importantly, I hope you learn how to make some very basic decisions on your own.

If you act superior to those people that take a parent to make bridal registry decisions, this may be a sign you have become too cynical. I hope when you call your mom for help about some petty decision you will remember your hypocrisy. And even though you try to chastise yourself for your arrogance, there is a smugness in knowing you will happily register with your future spouse... without your mom.

bravo

This is a face I could keep looking at (unlike the pictures from the previous post).

Thank goodness for real life heroes. It gives me pause to think of how likely I would have been to initiate help.

little resolve

I never follow through on New Year resolutions because, well, I'm not sure why. I am good at making firm decisions to not make goals. WAIT. Don't stop reading yet, as I have no desire to talk any more about resolutions. Take a look at this


Channel surfing reminded me again of the horror that is women body building. TLC has shown numerous times the "Supersize She" show. It is all about a woman's pursuit to look and sound horrific. I don't mean to be cruel but I cannot grasp the desire to look like this:

Their heads look so small and they look so manly. I'm not just a woman hater because this frightens me just as much. Please use weights in moderation, avoid steroids and tanning, and go easy on the body oil. It will create a much more visibly friendly world.

a very merry christmas

After hearing my flight was cancelled on Friday, and waiting for an hour and a half in a line to reschedule a flight, I started to feel a little dejected. There were some very nice people in line that made the time go by faster as we each shared our story. The girl behind me missed her connecting flight and her luggage was left in Arizona as they were told they could either take people or luggage. I quickly realized how fortunate I was to at least know where my bags were. I was relieved when I was given a flight the next morning. They told me they could release my bags to me so I could have a change of clothes. After waiting several hours to get my luggage I gave up and went to the hotel with my little toiletry bag from the airline. There were three Elders from my church that were on my original flight on their way home after their two year mission. I felt bad for them and their families having to wait one more day to see each other. My flight the next day was an hour and a half delayed which started to increase my anxiety. When they started boarding us I was in tears out of pure relief and happiness. I was so thankful to know that I would get home in time to spend Christmas with my family.

Tonight we had most the family together (we missed the Bostonians). We watched a video about the birth of the Savior and sang Christmas carols. I had the overwhelming feeling of gratitude to be a part of a loving family, sharing our love for Jesus Christ. We all laughed at my niece that is terrified of Santa. Any mention of his name brought her to tears while her parents reassured her that Santa would not come to their house. If this keeps up their holiday leverage will be "if you're naughty Santa is going to come." She's two so she may outgrow her Santaphobia. The kids will likely be hopped on sugar and excitement tomorrow so there will be more tears to come but that's what makes family gatherings so entertaining.

I hope all of you have a very Merry Christmas day. Thank you for the friendship and readership over the past year.

nice name

On Monday I opened my inbox to see that I had written myself an email. I thought it was strange because I didn't remember sending an email entitled "this is random." Thinking it was spam, I was about to delete it when curiosity got the best of me. I opened it up to discover that my name twin had googled herself and came across an old post of mine. Now, if my name was something common like Jenn Smith I might not find this so odd. Although my last name is fairly common, I have yet to meet another Aislinn. In our several emails we have discovered that we were born in the same year but that her name is pronounced phonetically while mine is the Gaelic pronunciation (Ashlyn). A very random but amusing experience.

my new friend

That's right. CLR is my new favourite bathroom cleaner. After burning my lungs several times using Lysol Bathroom Cleaner with Bleach, I decided to try something different. My former roommate left the glass shower doors with terrible watermarks and a dingy ring around the tub. I first bought the wretched Lysol cleaner as it professed to rid my bathroom of mildew and other stains. It helped a little but my health would quickly deteriorate after its use. I remembered the CLR ads of my youth, stating it was sold in fine establishments such as Canadian Tire, K-Mart, etc etc. The commercials showed it dissolving tough coffee stains and working miracles on hard water residue. On Saturday I experienced its amazing power. I could finally see through the glass, my sinks were sparkling and I didn't have four hours of pain and smoker's cough. This new bond is going to be tough to break. I still wish I could pay someone to clean my bathroom but until then, this $4 gem is my newest ticket to happiness.

oops

I went out my garage for my run on Saturday. Afterward I was stretching on my lawn when I noticed this:


Apparently my roommate got home at 3 a.m. the night before and must have been really exhausted, as the keys sat in that place for the next seven hours. It sure was fun to tease her.

dating s.o.s

I found this charming street sign while my sister and I were lost in San Francisco. If only life was full of S.O.S's for those in need of help, such as the sad chap in the following story. I find this amusing because I was not the person on the receiving end, although I dearly love the poor lass that was.

It all started Wednesday night when she received a call from a gentleman at her church. She did not answer the phone as it was an unidentified number. After listening to the message we were impressed that he called several days before the date, left her a compliment and had it all planned out. Several ingredients for a good time. The first warning sign was an anxious text the next day asking if she had received the message. This was brushed off as perhaps a little overeager. Friday was when the storm hit. This was not some regular ocean storm, it was a full on tsunami.

The first indication that the clouds had started to darken was when he stated to her "I've been wanting to ask you out for weeks because you're so damn sexy but I was never able to because you were out of church like lightning every time." Rain poured down with phrases such as "You are so sexy, do you know how sexy you are?", "I am with, by far, the prettiest girl here", "I LOVE the way you dress, it's so hot", " You have a rockin stomach and your body is perfect." While this is all true, I would like to restate that this was a first date with only a very brief conversation prior to the big event.

She was being engulfed with large waves with more and more questions, namely: So how is your romantic/dating life? How do you handle being so sexy? When did you last have a romantic encounter? So what was your first impression of me?

And then the tsunami hit. To quote her "He kept touching me ... we went to a concert... it was a sit down event... he quickly had his arm around me and tickled/scratched my back... I sat in a balled up position most of the show. Then also at dinner... arm around... and then the comments... "I'm sorry I keep touching you, I just can't help myself, you're so hot." Fast forward to the door scene... he had already pecked me on the cheek randomly when I was standing up at some point in the night... I was a little worried at the door as he had admitted earlier "I don't usually go more then three weeks without kissing a girl, although I've only once ever had a 'hookup.' So he walked me to the door, and I was carrying my bag and leftovers, so I went to give him an awkward hug, and his face came in... so mine went out, to the outside of his arm... and then quickly turned around and went in."

The storm was over but there were residual waves afterward. Several texts about how gorgeous and sexy she was with hopes of a second date. Although you would think it was my friend that needed the life raft on the date, it was this sad sack of a man that needed the help. Not only is it unattractive to be called sexy and to have unsolicited touching on a first date, it's actually offensive. So for those of you creating such storms, please keep them in the middle of the ocean where no one is impacted by your destructive sexual frustrations.